The impact my past traumatic experiences had on my life became obvious to me after I got married, and had two children. My parents were both born in Canada, moved to the United States and met in a boarding house. After they got married, my mother gave birth to me and five sons. My father’s behavior while under the influence of alcohol did not create problems when he drank socially, but he became mentally, emotionally and physically abusive after he started to abuse the use of alcohol and later, with chronic use, became an alcoholic. I noticed this same pattern of behavior when my husband overindulged in alcohol. Unfortunately, my five brothers, mother, myself and my children suffered the consequences of their addiction to alcohol by learning negative thoughts, irrational beliefs and not being allowed to identify or express our emotions. Because education about alcoholism was not available to my family of origin, our environment was often in crises. We had frequent visits from the police about my father and brothers behaviors. Because my brothers were physically abused by my father, they became bullies to their classmates and friends When I refused to attend school after being molested by my sixth-grade male teacher, my parents promised me that I could attend a Catholic high school in the city after I graduated from the eighth grade. I felt safe with the nuns and priest and decided to become a nun. When problems escalated in our home, I decided to become a Registered Nurse to find a way to help heal my family members. When nothing I did made a difference, I became interested in alternative methods of healing and graduated from the American Holistic Nurses Association. During that period of time, I became a Reiki Master and Shaman Practitioner.
While working as a Detox Nurse, I decided to become an addiction counselor and went back to college to get my Counseling Degree This knowledge of addiction helped me cope with my father, husband and eventually, my daughter’s disease of alcoholism. It took twenty years of intensive therapy to heal from the grief I felt when I lost two of my brothers and father to suicide and the death of my firstborn child. I decided to write my life memoir when I was seventy-eight years old to release me from the emotional pain of my past. It took twelve years to complete my book because I became re-traumatized when a repressed memory of my mothers attempt to drown us surfaced. My father physically abused her while he was intoxicated and my oldest brother called the police. As they handcuffed him to take him to jail he told my mother that he would kill her when he returned. I needed to undergo therapy again before I could continue writing. When I completed ” Creating a Wholesome Human Being,” I felt lighter and happier and began to feel a healing of my body, mind, and spirit. My healing journey from a traumatized child to a transformed woman helped me to learn the lessons my creator wanted me to learn and acknowledge my need to share this knowledge and wisdom with others.